i guess its time for things to end..
be it good or bad..
i will not say things thats not true.. you know me..
i didn't want things to turn out this way, but somehow.. it just became like that..
memories are still so sweet and fresh..
i was still talking about it yesterday..
even when i know that things are no longer the same..
i'm sorry i didn't treasure whatever we had..
but thank you for all the wonderful memories..
i hope that things will return to what it was in the very beginning..
and that we will not hence become strangers..
sorry..
and thank you...

+ [A]nGe| @ 14:40

people PLEASE help me do this survey oki??
its a survey about blogging, and there's 2 parts to it..
so to all the bloggers and non-bloggers, please please help me do the survey oki?
it won't take you more then 10 minutes to do it..
i personally have done it already..
and i need the results real soon, so ya.. =)
THANK YOU!!!

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.asp?u=81722902582

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.asp?u=96502902594

please do both surveys oki??
by the way, i didn't explain why i need these results right??
right.. i'm taking this module called CS1105: Computing & Society
and we're supposed to do a project to recognise a trend in singapore nowadays blah blah blah..
so my group is doing blogging, so ya..
once again, i need the results REAL SOON!!
so please help oki okie??
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

+ [A]nGe| @ 17:31

i will walk past my corridor everyday and miss my bird..
i still can't believe that it is dead..
it was still so lively this morning..
dad said it died from over-eating.. -_-"
which i simply refuse to believe..
i'd rather believe it died from old age..
i am so sad..
29th mar is my bird's death anniversary..
the day that the cdo guys r back..
the day of cerise n yx's anniversary..
OUR BIRD DIED!!!

it was like part of our family already..
and now it suddenly died without any signs or symptoms..
how can it so heartlessly abandoned us?!!!!!

hai..

have you ever lied on your bed and wonder why are you alive??
i have..
since i was very young..
i wonder what is going on in my body..
wonder what it is like to be dead..
wonder why is it that i am alive..
wonder what will happen when i'm dead..
wonder what if i am not a human, but an animal..
wonder what if i am not born into singapore..

i know..
i think too much..

ciao!

+ [A]nGe| @ 21:44

the birdie at home died le!!!!
mom came home just now and found the bird dead..
i'm so sad..
afterall the bird spent almost 7 mths at my hse..
still remember how lifely it used to be, chirping away all day.. now its dead..
found the bird weird for the past few days.. very quiet and keep eating non-stop..
i even complained to my dad that its getting fatter..
now my dad has no1 to whistle to when he comes home from work..
and there's no1 to entertain me when i'm bored..
no1 for my mom to bathe when she waters the plants..
no1 for us to look after..
rest in peace, our dear birdie..
*soBz*

+ [A]nGe| @ 13:36

to all who always read my blog, you will know that i always blog when i'm in a bad mood..
and here i am again..

am online the whole day long nowadays..
playing online games and stuff..
everything but studying..
i'm gonna fail this sem again..

am online now again..
want to sleep, but must wait for my hair to dry..
so i'm here playing online games again..
i want to get away from my hp..

i want to save some pride and self-esteem for myself..
i want to be happy..

+ [A]nGe| @ 22:21

well i guess i haven't blogged about something nice in quite a while.. read irene's blog and somehow i got the mood to blog about yesterday =)

i know that anniversary's gone for a looooooong time already, but we haven't had our annual anniversary dinner @ fish & co. hence despite the fact that we're both broke and everything, we decided to spend the last of our dollars there. (okie i was exaggerating) anyway, we met up only at around 4 cause i was deciding whether to go tomb-sweeping with my dad, which i didn't in the end. went down to PS and it was raining quite heavily on the bus!! -sian- well the sky cleared up upon reaching town

there was ALOT of events going on in town!! i haven't been to town on a saturday ever since duno-when. dear always can't book out on saturdays. so finally i got my wish!!! haha.. there was a NUS bouldering contest and i saw this girl with VERY STRONG ARMS!!! her muscles are as big as my dear's!!! (haha not that my dear's has BIG muscles) i was just exclaiming away how strong she is throughout the whole thing.

i saw quan yifeng and zhong qin too!!!! recording 'yuan lai jiu shi ni'. the male lead is SHOOO SHUAI!! haha look out for the 4th episode oki? you people might just catch me standing beside 2 of the females. i took ALOT of pictures as well. haha i happened to bring my camera that day. will upload the pictures soon!! so that you guys reading my blog can have a view of the male lead. haha n i might reveal who he finally chose.

thought the way that he answer was revealed was pretty stupid.
the candidates will go:"yuan lai shi wo ma?"
then if the candidate is who the lead chose, he/she will say:"yuan lai jiu shi ni"
-_-"" lame right?

watched till the recording finished and we hurriedly walked to fish & co for fear that rain's gonna come tumbling down soon. the sky was SOOO overcast. went upstairs this time round. it always rain whenever we visit fish & co. haha it was like this the last time too.

didn't order seafood platter for 2 though. cause we had a bad experience of not being able to finish it the last time round. order seafood platter for 1 + fish n chips. however, we soon realised that the problem does not lie with the food. the problem lies with me!! i eat a little bit then full liao. haha so dear had to finish up the food for me. so he's eating 3/4 of everything. no wonder both of us always end up so full whenever we go to restaurants. =/ haha sry arh..

walked around town. think i saw sophie at hereens. i wasn't sure though. wanted to go to a pub, but i was afraid of having the smoke smell in my hair. gave up the idea in the end. cause dear said there's this pub opposite peace centre that has nice ambience and everything, with a band. haha maybe i will consider dropping after october (after smoking is BANNED in pubs and clubs) haha.. i like that idea. but most probably until then i don't want to go le.

and my heels are killing my feet yesterday. poor feet. promise myself i'm not gonna torture my feet anymore. =)

bro's ill.. hope he recovers soon.

+ [A]nGe| @ 11:55

i just realised a dearie posted a comment in one of my sad entries..
and named himself/herself the least important person in my life..
THATS SO NOT TRUE!!!
i love every single one who left a comment/tag and every single who did not..
anyway, the point is..
YOU ARE IMPORTANT!!!
so please state your name okie?
*hugs*

-posted by-
the biggest b**** you can ever find..

+ [A]nGe| @ 14:24

decided to skip lunch today..
disappointed..
by the series of 'no action'..
i want to have gastric pain..

alot of things, just because you hope it would happen don't mean it would..
i can do alot of things..
but i always treat people the way they treat me..
if i feel that you're not nice to me,
i'll be even worse to you..
things are event-based..
1 thing leads to another..
sometimes it's just torturing me..

phone has no vibration..
wonder what's wrong with my phone..

sometimes i also hope that i can be a sweet lil grl..
but i can't..
i'm:
-critical
-mean
-unappreciative
-don't know how to respect people
-thinks that the whole world owes me something
-pms-ing 365 days a year
-am a total bitch

i'm just not good enough..
everyone just shun me as soon as you see me okay??
i'm a bad BAD BAD girl..

you don't understand me

+ [A]nGe| @ 14:11

my parents leave me 1 day n i'll be left all alone?!!!
i'll be so sad.. =*(
rem how we used to think abt how nice it wld be if we can live by ourselves and enjoy all the freedom in the world?!!
i used to be one of them..
suddenly i'm so scared of living alone and what is going to happen to me if my parents are not ard anymore..
i know.. *touchwood!!!!*
i hope my husband will live with my parents in future..
i love my parents so much..
suddenly i feel like joining them for tomb-sweeping..
do something that a descendent shld do..
i want to be a filial girl..
i love my family.. =)
*daddy mommy i love you*

+ [A]nGe| @ 22:15

for all the comments left on my tag board..
i know that there are still people who care for me..
just like the way i care for them too..
-smiles-
love all of u..
*hugs*
thankyou..

+ [A]nGe| @ 09:10

by things that happening..
suddenly realised i'm so not trusted..
realised that i'm so not being understood..
i dun like to explain..
if thats the way u tink i am, its okie..
i find it so pointless to explain myself..
i believe that if u truely understand me, u will know..

met ernst that day while gg to chi lecture..
and he made a comment:
"eh why your entries always seem so sad?"
and i didn't know how to reply him..
i don't know too..
i only blog when i'm down??
n i seem to be always down nowadays..
haiz don't know wth is happening to me too..

n a friend of mine..
just turned into a total b****
taking advantage of the person who loves her so much..
intending to squeeze him dry of his money before breaking up with him..
suddenly i feel that i don't know her at all..
quote something that he said before..
why is she turning from bad to worse??
ya.. i've know all along that she is 1 who makes use of other people..
but.. but..
this is too much!!!!!

-sigh-
what is the world coming to??
i feel so sorry towards all my friends..
i haven't been talking to you people lately..
haven't been able to care for you guys lately..
sorry..

+ [A]nGe| @ 08:28

well i visited ernst's blog in the wee hours of the morning.. hmz instead of doing my work (cuz i'm still eating my breakfast), i was reading thru blogs.. i found this which i tink is very true.. hence.. TADA!! enjoy reading..

with the courtesy of ernst...:

One day, Plato asked his teacher, “What is love? How can I find it?”

His teacher answered, “There is a vast wheat field in front. Walk forward without turning back, and pick only one stalk. If you find the most magnificent stalk, then you have found love.”

Plato walked forward, and before long, he returned with empty hands, having picked nothing. His teacher asked, “Why did you not pick any stalk?”

Plato answered, “Because I could only pick once, and yet I could not turn back. I did find the most magnificent stalk, but did not know if there were any better ones ahead, so I did not pick it. As I walked further, the stalks that I saw were not as good as the earlier one, so I did not pick any in the end.”

His teacher then said, “And that is love.”

On another day, Plato asked his teacher, “What is marriage? How can find it?”

His teacher answered, “There is a thriving forest in front. Walk forward without turning back, and chop down only one tree. If you find the tallest tree, then you have found marriage. ”

Plato walked forward, and before long, he returned with a tree. The tree was not thriving, and it was not tall either. It was an ordinary tree. His teacher asked, “Why did you chop down such an ordinary tree?”

Plato answered, “Because of my previous experience. I walked halfway through the forest, but returned with empty hands. This time, I saw this tree, and I felt that it was not bad, so I chopped it down and brought it back. I did not want to miss the opportunity.”

His teacher then said, “And that is marriage.”

+ [A]nGe| @ 07:18

congrats to all who takes the same module as me..
cause i'm a lousy student..
producing shitty term papers..

i'm gonna screw up this sem as well..
i can sense it..
*sigh*

its time to devote more time for myself..
AND my studies, of course..

+ [A]nGe| @ 16:44

wana say HAPPI BIRTHDAY!!!!
to this pri sch fren of mine..
i think only irene, loo ad xiang will know who i'm talking abt..
right?!! *winkx*

anyways, happi bday to u...
may u have a happi happi yr ahead.. =)

+ [A]nGe| @ 23:01

i cant be online..
i do everything but to do my term paper..
half the day gone n i'm onli 1 page into my 10 page paper..
but i'm sad..
i want to write something..
i want to tell my fren that there are other more impt things than him..
i wana tell her that he's really not worth it..
open ur eyes!!!!!
look at the friends around you who really care for you..
can you bear to let them down like this..
he is just a chapter in your life and this chapter is CLOSED!!!
over already..
he has already moved on.. you can do the same too!!!!!
please please dont let this affect your studies..
go ahead and be sad.. go ahead and cry..
but after you finish crying, stand up and move on..
whether you hate him or whether you love him, it's over already..
either decision you make is gonna affect you..
please, move on..
its not easy, i know..
forget him...

+ [A]nGe| @ 11:35

dun have eggs la, shit got alot la..
meaning: this person is very troublesome.. only know how to find trouble for me.. to the person who reads this arh.. u noe what i'm talking abt arh..
*argh*

anyways, been MIA for a long time.. no time to be online..
been bz bz bz the whole week..
then i fell sick.. =(
hit the highest temp of 37.9 degrees..
erm tts considered high for me le.. =S
but anyways, being a qualified first aider, ppl always noe i like to self treat..
conclusion: i din c the doc AGN..
i noe i noe.. stop scolding me la..

btw, i have to finish up the shit 1st la.. no time for my own stuff..
2 papers due this week..
i'm dead..

+ [A]nGe| @ 22:15

my bro juz applied for internet service for his new hse n gt a digi cam free..
so nice rite..
n cuz he oredi has a digi cam, he's planning to sell this..
but his own digi cam is onli 2 pixel whereas the new 1 is 4.1 pixel.. =S
farnie rite??
i wan to buy his new digi cam..
den he say:"haiyo.. buy for what?"
he dun realise he's gonna move out n soon i wun have a digi cam to use!!!!!
*hmph*
tink my mom knows what i mean..
well i don't buy paying for the cam..
because every1 refuses to let me pay for stuff!!!!
but i work what..
i teach tuition and earn $$..
i know i know..
its good to have people pampering me..
but i feel so useless..
anyways, its a HP digi cam..
izit gd?!!
hee i'm an electronics idiot..

+ [A]nGe| @ 15:28

gd news is tt the chi term paper is postponed..
*cheers!!!!*

bad news is tt i realised i still dun like her..
haha shan't mention names..
but aft so long i still dun like her..
duno y oso.. mabbe its cuz i duno her well enuff..

+ [A]nGe| @ 17:35

juz found another blue black on my knee..
sometimes i feel tt my blood vessels r so fragile, they break at the slightest touch..
hmz i wonder whether break is the correct word to use..
i haven study for my test.. i'm SHOOO dead tml..

sometimes when a person is disappointed too many times,
he/she decides tt enough is enough..
n decided to put an end to the whole ting..
having placed so much trust n so much confidence n so much hope into it, onli to b disapointed at the end of the day..
it takes courage to stick to ur decision too..
but sometimes it juz gets so tiring..
u feel that the request is not too much, but somehow it juz cant seem to b answered..
juz a small small wish that any simple person can accomplised..
it juz doesn't seem to happen to u till its too late..
n when the person finally heard ur plea despite u repeating it so many times, its too late..
so tired.. so tired..
u dun wana try anymore..
u dun wana cry anymore..
u finally decides tt this is the last time sth lidat is gonna happen..
hence, things start changing..
for the beta or for the worse, u duno..
u juz noe tt, u r suffering..
n tts too much for a person to tk oredi..
i feel..
cuz its too much for me to tk..
i've decided enuff is enuff..
i wan to stop acting like an idiot..
n i've decided tt tings shld finally come to an end..
hence i made a decision..
1 tt will protect me..
n ensure that i will not cry anymore..
i juz hope it is a gd decision..
wish me luck..

i'm hurt..

+ [A]nGe| @ 22:29

its been a long long time since my fone last rang n some1 on the other line is looking for me for a nice nice chat..
hmz i tink the last 1 hu called is loo..
n tts a LOOOOONG time ago.. cuz she's having her mock now.. take care n study hard, gal..
yupz i was saying..
i miss the times when ppl will call me n chat like nobody's biz..
zhebin, jianen, junnan, jason chang, yuting, irene (she still does call), loo (she does call me still)..
n of cuz there r others but i cant tink now..
oh.. n JY.. my dear beloved gal..
those were the days..

i just like to nag.. no hidden meanings..
n to a particular some1..
i'm not blogging juz so tt u will feel bad..
NO.. i'm NOT trying to do tt..
i juz wana blog..

tts the bad pt abt blogging..
u NEED a disclaimer..

+ [A]nGe| @ 19:15

btw, i forgot to congrat dear Mr. Lee on his successful 1st attempt for his driving test!!!!
~cheers!!!!~
n i promised to buy him a street directory..
hee i must get my pay 1st lah..

+ [A]nGe| @ 10:45

i dun wan my dearie to buy me a digi cam..
i dun wana b a spoilt brat..
if i wan sth i will save up n buy it myself.. =)
i hafta admit tt it'll b grt if i can receive 1 as a prez..
but.. NO!!!!! i cant allow tt!!!!
i'm a independent girl n i wan tings to stay tt way..
no, i'm not trying out the reverse psychology..
i juz wana b independent n not b a spoilt brat... like erhem...
*oops* i tink my dear cerise will noe wat i mean rite?? haha

anyways, went jogging early in the morning n i feel healthy..
erm i noe tt my body is SERIOUSLY out of form..
but at least i made a step to start toning it back to its old form..
not tt the old form was any better..

my dear irene girl..
rem to call me no matter how late it is if u nid me okie?
i dun wana b a fren hu leaves her fren crying alone..
u noe tt no matter how late it is u can juz call if u wan..
my msg tone veh soft la!! i cant hear 1.. so u muz call long long den i will wake up..
n to all my frens..
juz call me if u nid a listening ear..
no nid to b afraid of waking me up.. =)
u ppl noe i lurve all of u..

+ [A]nGe| @ 09:50